Fire & Ice
by MermaidAssassin
Summary: Kaidan learns the hard way that Shepard was telling the truth.


Note: Yes, I know his name is spelled KAIDAN but I have a friend named Kaiden and I'm so used to putting an E so bare with me if you see an E instead of an A. Not doing it on purpose or to piss off any fangirls, promise. If you see a misspell anywhere, don't jump down my throat but can you point it out?

* * *

Kaidan couldn't believe it. Shepard really wasn't with Cerberus after all.

And he found it all out the hard way.

Of course, anybody would've found it hard to believe that Udina was actually the one who had betrayed them. Now, here in the hospital Kaidan found his nerves were ready to make him sick again. When Tali'Zorah and Garrus walked through the doors, he jumped up and practically ran to them.

"H-how is she?"

Garrus' glare pierced through him, "You shot her in the chest. How do you think she is?"

"I- I didn't know-"

"That Shepard wasn't with Cerberus anymore? How many times had Anderson told you she wasn't? How many times did SHE tell you?" Garrus was furious. Jane Shepard was like a younger sister to him and the one man she loved had shot her after believing the false truth that she was the enemy.

Thankfully, Tali jumped in and put a hand on the Turian's shoulder. He calmed a bit when she whispered to him and requested that he go sit down.

"Kaidan, she has lost a lot of blood from the bullet wound but she will make it. You missed her heart-"

"Tali-"

She held up her hand, "Shut up. Now, the bullet broke into pieces when it reached her chest which is why the surgery took so long. The doctors made sure every piece was found."

"Good, good! So, she's okay?"

"She was conscious for a moment. After they stitched her up… She asked if you were alright."

"Me? She asked if I…"

"Come with me." Tali'Zorah led him towards Shepard's room, "I think you should see her…"

"You're the only one."

As if on cue, Dr. Chakwas walked up to Tali and put a gentle hand on her arm, "Tali, why is he here?"

"I'm taking him to see Shepard."

The older woman sighed and put a hand to her head.

Tali looked back at Kaidan and shook her head, "You stay here." Then she grabbed Chakwas by her hand and pulled her into one of the spare rooms, though the door did not shut completely. Kaidan silently stepped towards the door and put his ear beside of the small opening.

"Do you not remember what happened after Horizon?! How she woke up every single night with her heart beating fast, how her chest was hurting? It was, not because of the nightmares she has about being spaced but about him leaving her the way he did! The pain was literally heart break!"

"But she still loves him!"

"Tali-!"

"Trust me on this, please!"

"Tali, he has done nothing but cause her emotional pain since she met back up with him on Earth. Her implants from Cerberus have healed her body a great deal. She wants to go back to the Normandy now."

A few days later, they were back up in the sea of stars and fighting like they were before trying to bring the many races together.

He was on his way to her cabin when EDI contacted him, startling him in the quiet elevator.

"What is it?"

"Commander Shepard has seemed to have blacked out. Her heart rate-" That was all he bothered to hear before he took off out of the elevator and straight into Shepard's private quarters. There he found her on the floor in front of the aquarium. On her side, facing him with her hands beside her face and her legs slightly bent. Her long red haired was covering her beautiful face but he could tell by her hands that she was paler than usual.

Kaidan wasted no time in running to her side. He hesitated at first, gently moving her hair from her face. His hands very carefully moved her body over so that she was on her back, checking her for any injuries from the fall. For a moment he focused on her neck, making sure nothing was broken.

"Jane?"

Her eyes twitched a bit with a quiet groan escaping her lips.

"I'll get Chakwas-"

"No…"

"Shepard-"

"No!" Her dark blue eyes opened and glared up at him, "Why are you here."

"EDI-"

"Damnit EDI!"

It seemed she wouldn't let him finish any of his sentences. "Shepard-"

"Kaidan, I allowed you to come on board the Normandy to help fight. That's it. Now leave…"

All signs of dehydration and lack of sleep were covering her. Alenko was not surprised when she blacked back out and fellinto his arms. "EDI, can you request someone to send up some food and water?"

"I have already informed Dr. Chakwas of the situation. She is gathering various items including food and water to bring up there."

Shepard tried not to panic when she was embraced by the darkness of space. She couldn't inhale or exhale. The entire time, Kaidan's voice was still accusing her of being a traitor-

"Kaidan!" She gasped while holding the scar over her chest where he had shot. Thinking she was alone, she sat there with her hand on her chest, sobbing and whispering his name. She was shaking horribly.

Kaidan beside, half behind her against the wall, was torn as to what he should do. It was so surprising to see her this way, all he wanted to do was hold her.

"Jane…"

Her head jerked around to his voice and she looked terrified and defeated as her eyes looked him over, "Get out."

Not wanting to stress her out anymore, he stood up and left.

A few hours later, he found himself back outside of her cabin. He somehow wanted to ask her forgiveness, especially after finding out how much damage he really caused on Horizon.

"Every word you're saying is a lie. Run away my dear, but every sign will say your heart is dead."

Kaidan heard her singing from outside, her voice beautiful like it always was. He saw the door was unlocked so invited himself in.

"Closer to insanity, buries me alive. Where's the life we once had? It cannot be denied. Why can't you see what we had? Let the fire burn the ice. Where's the love we once had, is it all a lie? "

He saw her back facing him while she stood at her computer, singing to herself while she went through her messages.

"And I still wonder why heaven has died. The skies are all falling, I'm breathing but why? In silence I hold on to you and I..."

Kaidan made his way to her and grabbed her by her arm, turned her around, "Jane, I'm sorry. Please, hear me out. It was a council member, I thought I was doing the right thing. I was just following orders... And Horizon, I'm so very sorry for that. I understand now. I just want you to know how I feel and I don't want you to be afraid of me anymore."

"Kaidan-"

"I want to make a request... That things will go back to the way they were before you... Forgive me." He trailed off and started to turn around but was surprised when Shepard grabbed him by his face and pressed her lips to his.

When she pulled away she gazed into his eyes, "I'm trying. Give me time, alright? I still love you."


End file.
